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A picture tells a thousand words? Maybe so but ... words also paint too many pictures! However, in doing so, they reveal the heart!

*some names have been changed

Past Blogs

Other Journals:

Dinah's Coffee Talk

Friday, June 29, 2001
The More You Know...

Someone in my family was poisoned with salmonella. He got it from cleaning the aquarium of a pet turtle. He's cute, but not that cute! Did you know that most domesticated animals including but not limited to cats, dogs, reptiles, etc. carry salmonella and other harmful bacteria? Uggghhh! I'm no biology major, but I have the internet at my fingertips. Folks, if you don't wash your hand, now is the time to do so!!

posted by Kerr Bear 11:05 PM

Thursday, June 28, 2001

Free at Last

Since I've been open about my christianity, I often get a few puns and jokes thrown in my face when I am in the company of "unbelievers" and/or "back sliders" (namely my brother and his friends). Of course, they do it out of fun and love, but not to intentionally hurt me. However, I brush it off and reaffirm my faith.

Today I payed them a visit. Of course, I expected the jokes to come rolling out. They did. I payed no mind. Why feed the fire? Instead, I remained quiet and unmoved by the comments. Later, we headed to Wendy's where we would order dinner. So I hitched a ride with Paul*.

On the way, I warned Paul.
"Be careful, the cops are strict here." Sure enough, there was a cop hidden behind the bend. Although, he was not speeding, he got tense. Suddenly, the cop pulled out behind us.

"Oh S#@%, I am going to get arrested. I have a warrant out for an outstanding ticket. ," he said in exasperation.
"Why is he pulling you over?" I asked glancing at his speedometer which measured within legal limits.
"I don't know!" he shrugged, "It might be my seatbelt." Slowly and smoothly, he replaced his seatbelt.
"I'm gonna get arrested," he continually repeated over and over again under his breath as the cop approached. "Call your brother, tell him I'm going to get arrested," he said in anguish.
I can't drive stick, I thought to myself. Oh man, how embarassing!! For a minute, my mind was racing.
I looked at him with a sudden calm. "I'm not calling him just yet, (the officer) may let you go," I said with the sudden urge to seize the moment and pray silently.

The officer had pulled him over for not displaying his license plate on the front bumper which had fallen off three days ago. He continued to follow standard procedure by asking for the DL and proof of insurance. As he looked them over, he returned the insurance slip, but returned to the police car with his DL.

He continued to panic. I told him to calm down and I was praying for him.

We have all had offenses that were past due in this lifetime. Maybe not traffic tickets, but sins of the flesh which we have not repented for. However, no matter how late we are, God's given us grace that will always sets us free by the blood that was shed on the cross.

I prayed this afternoon that the officer would exhibit grace and mercy as an example of Jesus Christ's love. That this circumstance would allow Paul to know and appreciate His love for us, all jokes aside.

After what seemed like eternity ( a tense 5 minutes), the officer came back with his license.

"I'm just going to issue you a warning this time, but make sure you post your license plate immediately."
"Yes, sir. Have a good day!" Paul replied.
Whew! Praise the Lord! He came through again!!
Paul was relieved and extremely thankful. I simply let him know it wasn't me, it was God.

I've realized that there is a balance for everything while living a christian life. There is a time to profess your faith, the hope that you have, and the Lord that you serve. There's also a time to just walk like Christ and stand out quietly through humility, a patient attitude, and an understanding heart. Seeing people through the eyes of Christ will help you to be patient and not defensive. Then through prayer and petition, the Lord will do the rest.

posted by Kerr Bear 9:07 PM

Wednesday, June 27, 2001


I'm not sure if I want to admit this to the world, but anyone close to me already knows I am very conscious about my weight. I feel I am too skinny. Sadly enough, too many people agree. I hate that... it's my weakness. First of all, I find it extremely hard to find stylish jeans or pants that are fitted , but at the same time don't hug my legs like a second skin. Secondly, something I feel strognly about, why is it a perfect stranger has no problem pointing out the obvious (ie, "GIIIRRRRLLLLL, you are too skinny! You need to put some meat on those bones!")? Tell me something I don't know, please!! However, it is absolutely rude to call an obviously big person, fat? Aren't we both opposites of the same spectrum?

In case you aren't aware, it is just as hard to gain weight with a fast metabolism, as it is to lose weight with a slow metabolism!! We are both working hard to fight against our metabolisms. When I was pregnant with Isaiah, I actually thought this would be my opportunity to work my way backwards to the perfect weight. Right!! I actually ended up losing more weight and currently stand about 7 lbs. less than my pre-pregnancy weight!! Go figure!! Other ladies say just wait until you have your second child. No thanks!! I'll try alternative solutions for the mean time. Thank God have the best girl friends!! They always reassure me that I am not sickly skinny (Whew!!). In their eyes, I look fine. And, they will be the first to point out, "hey, you gained some weight!"

Any girl out there feel me or know where I'm coming from? Email me, lets vent!

posted by Kerr Bear 8:27 PM

Tuesday, June 26, 2001

Just say "NO"!!

Another campaign against drugs? Nope!! Just a truly bad habit I have. When I don't feel up to doing something, I often agree anyway just because I don't have the heart to say 'no'.

I've always been labeled as being "too nice"!! When someone invites me, urges me, tells me what I can do, should do, will do, I am a sucker for giving in rather than declining. Not to say that I never want to do anything. However, I just go along more often than not. All too many times have I put myself "in between a rock and a hard place." I often find hidden anger towards myself or allow resentment to harbor towards the person who talked me into it. All I had to do was say 'no', simple as that!! It's not that I don't keep my promises, but I either force myself to follow through with the plans against my true wishes, or I put myself in an embarassing position to have to apologize and let the person down.

Recently, a friend of a friend found out I was job hunting. Joan* was nice enough to suggest that I apply for a flexible receptionist position for her dad's firm. In other words, she could hook me up!! It was a gracious offer. Being polite yet foolish, I showed limited interest. Although, I knew already that I was not looking for a clerical position. While, I emphasized I had to think about it, I continued to nod my head and say, "I was interested." I thought that would get me by for right now, but before I knew it, she was on the phone raving about me to her dad.

"She's grade A material," she said as she sold me to her dad. She continued to sum up my resume with a hint of exaggeration.

If I were her father I would want to meet me too according to her description! Wow! What a saleswoman!! While it seemed very esteeming at the time, the horror of the situation I just put myself into began to sink in. What did I just do? Why didn't I just say "no thanks"? Of course not, not Kerry. NNNOOOO, she's always trying to make everyone happy at her own expense. Why must I always learn the hard way?

Too make a long story short, she got her dad to "pencil me in" for 9:00 am tomorrow morning for an interview with his executive secretary and himself. Joan was excited about it and very reassuring. I, on the other hand, had just dug myself a deep hole. I smiled meekly and could say nothing but "okay" and "thank you". Initially, I imagined myself working for this firm with more hours than I had anticipated, and kicking myself for saying "yes".

So what happened? After much unnecessary deliberation, tension, and anxiety, I called her up and apologized. I told her I had decided it wasn't the job I was looking for. I thanked her for her help. Her response included one word responses like "okay", "uh huh", "alright", and "bye". She was very disappointed in me. I was relieved and also troubled.

So what did I learn? Better to say 'no' now, than pay for it later. Not only did I let the situation go too far, but I let her and her father down after she bragged about me. Was it worth it? NO! NO! NO!
posted by Kerr Bear 9:47 PM

Monday, June 25, 2001

Power of Prayer

Prayer is so amazing!! Have you been in any type of bind and prayed about it first? We so often tend to take it upon ourselves to straighten things out. We worry and stress about it!! What does worrying and stressing about problems do to solve them... absolutely nothing!! But when you let the Lord take it from you and deal with it, the burden is not only lifted off of your shoulders, but he takes care of it for you or leads you in the right direction with your best interest in mind. Wow!! What a God send, literally!! I can't even count the many prayers the Lord has answered and unwittingly his response unfolded before me when I least expected it. However, don't expect an answer immediately, the Lord has perfect timing in all things. He says many times in the bible, "Be still!! ....Wait! and be of good courage!!..." He always keeps his promises!

In the Bible, Hebrews 11:1, it says much about the importance of faith. "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Many times I wonder, if I do not always see the work of the Lord, yet sometimes he reveals an early glimpse of his answer or what's to come. Than how much greater is his work that I cannot see and that of which I am completely unaware of.

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." Ephesians 3:20

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-7

Have you allowed the Lord to solve your problems or have you become a slave to them? If you haven't already, I challenge you to repent of your sins and accept Jesus Christ, as your Lord and Savior.

"But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us," said the man.
"'If you can?'", said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes!" Mark 9:22-24
posted by Kerr Bear 9:37 PM